About

Vanessa of Little by Little Laughing with Child in Rain

Vanessa Collett is the heart behind Little by Little Parenting & Consulting, where she empowers parents and educators to see the unique child in front of them with trust and warmth. With over a decade as a preschool director and currently an MFT trainee, she brings a BS in Human and Family Development and a deep commitment to attachment-based, research-informed principles. Based in Long Beach, CA, Vanessa guides families and classrooms with practical strategies for connection, boundaries, and those cherished “little wins”—inspired by her own journey raising three incredible children (ages 27, 24, and 13).

A believer that behavior is communication and that connection and boundaries go hand in hand, she offers a judgment-free space to navigate the joys and challenges of parenting and teaching. Whether through 1:1 coaching, teacher shadowing, or her Substack insights, Vanessa’s goal is to build clarity, confidence, and supportive relationships, step by step.

My Philosophy

At the heart of my work at Little by Little is the belief that all behavior is communication — a window into what a child needs, whether it’s connection, autonomy, rest, or the safety of a boundary. I approach each moment with curiosity, not judgment, looking beneath the surface to respond with empathy rather than react impulsively.

I’ve learned that connection and boundaries go hand in hand, a principle rooted in attachment-based, research-informed insights on child development. This balance creates a nurturing space where children — and the adults who guide them — can thrive. Less noise, fewer words, and a purposeful pause often speak louder than constant action, allowing us to celebrate the small victories that build confidence and clarity.

For both parents and educators, my philosophy is about trusting your instincts, seeing the unique child in front of you, and guiding them step by step. Mistakes happen, and that’s where repair becomes powerful — coming back together strengthens relationships. Whether in a home or classroom, I believe in fostering supportive connections through these little wins, creating a foundation of trust and growth for every family and learning environment.

Vanessa of Little by Little in Outdoor Classroom with Rainbow of Toddlers