Meet Vanessa
Vanessa Collett is the heart behind Little by Little.
With over a decade as a play-based preschool director and 25+ years of parenting experience, Vanessa brings both practical wisdom and deep empathy to her work. She holds a B.S. in Human and Family Development and is currently completing her graduate coursework as a Marriage and Family Therapy trainee, with a growing specialization in early childhood mental health.
Her MFT training allows her to approach early childhood programs with a dual lens seeing both the educational environment and the emotional well-being of the children, families, and educators within it. She understands how stress, relationships, and systemic pressures ripple through classrooms, and she works to create spaces where everyone, not just the children, can thrive.
Vanessa has led parent education courses and been trained in a variety of parenting frameworks, giving her a well-rounded perspective on the needs of both children and caregivers. Her work blends educational consulting with a therapeutic approach, grounded in attachment theory, systems thinking, and the understanding that behavior is communication.
Based in San Clemente, California, she partners with educators to clarify their program values, strengthen reflective practices, and build sustainable systems that protect the foundations of healthy development through play.
Whether through 1:1 coaching, teacher shadowing, workshops, or her Substack Little by Little, Vanessa’s mission is to help others build clarity, confidence, and community — one muddy footprint at a time.
She’s also the proud mom of three kids — ages 27, 24, and 13 — who continue to teach her what it means to grow alongside our children.
My Philosophy
At the heart of my work at Little by Little is the belief that all behavior is communication — a window into what a child needs, whether it’s connection, autonomy, rest, or the safety of a boundary. I approach each moment with curiosity, not judgment, looking beneath the surface to respond with empathy rather than react impulsively.
I’ve learned that connection and boundaries go hand in hand, a principle rooted in attachment-based, research-informed insights on child development. This balance creates a nurturing space where children — and the adults who guide them — can thrive.
Less noise, fewer words, and a purposeful pause often speak louder than constant action, allowing us to celebrate the small victories that build confidence and clarity.
For both parents and educators, my philosophy is about trusting your instincts, seeing the unique child in front of you, and guiding them step by step. Mistakes happen, and that’s where repair becomes powerful — coming back together strengthens relationships. Whether in a home or classroom, I believe in fostering supportive connections through these little wins, creating a foundation of trust and growth for every family and learning environment.
